I answer the door in sweatpants and a raggedy old t-shirt. I have three-day unshowered hair scooped up and pulled into a haphazard bun, greasy strands escaping the restraints of my elastic rubber band. I don’t have to swipe lipgloss on or part my lips in a smile. I don’t have to make small talk, I just unhinge the lock and swing the door open without hiding behind it. I let them in without first swiping mascara on my lashes or vanishing in a cloud of dry shampoo trying to hide the damage of the …
Mental Illness
A Mind On Fire: A SheLoves Post
My life is one long rerouting. Only I’ve not had the pleasure of Google Maps patiently telling me that I’ve taken a wrong turn and that it’s calculating the next best option to get me to my destination. Instead, I’ve lived one-way streets and stop signs, merging into single lanes and tight spaces. My life has been roadblocks and potholes and miles out of my way with no rest stop in sight. I type the address into my phone to get to her office. Google Maps turns me this way and that and I …
Alone in the World: A SheLoves Post
The answering machine clicks on after the fourth ring. I untuck my feet from beneath me and rise from the couch. I’m pacing back and forth, my bare feet grazing the cool hard wood floor. The ground is steady, it is me that is shaking. I realize I am holding my breath waiting for a voice on the other end. I remember the anticipation I had as a girl, mustering the courage to call the cute boy. I’d wait until the kitchen was clear and I’d pull the phone from the wall and stretch the ringlets of …
